Frustrated Mom

Yes that describes me today. Christmas came and went and so did the new year. Work is busy as usual and the boys are back in school. I'm glad to be back on a schedule. I usually walk daily with two ladies from the neighborhood. Friday morning started as usual with us walking but it was super cold. When we started out it was 17 degrees and I had on 4 layers of clothes and two sets of gloves. I sure didn't want to get cold but I do need to walk. We were walking right along until the car started coming. We all tried to get out of the way and I ended up stepping in a pot hole. I fell and hurt my hand and my foot. Both seem to be better and I know it will just take a little while to get well and start walking again. Fast forward to Sunday. Found out that the clutch is out in McMuffin's truck. I've said before we need to fix it and now its broken and it needs to be fixed really soon. I'm afraid it will just sit there with the excuse we can't fix it now and I'll end up with no vehicle. McMuffin will have to use my car or rather I'll let him since I only work one mile away but now is no time for this. We can't seem to fix my air in my car thats been broke for 3 years, nor can we fix the pop pop I have in my front end when I turn. The truck that I'm usually stuck with has no air, the door is screwed up and other things are screwed up on it. Now the other truck is broke and I just know there will be excuse after excuse on fixing this one too. I'm tired of this merry go round and want off.

Leading up to Christmas

Just a week is left until Christmas. The outside decorations went up early this year. I was surprised that Pop wanted to put lights up since I usually do and he never gets around to it. I gave up years ago trying to make this happen. After the lights went up we put the tree up. Last year I didn't want a tree up. It just makes me sad since the money is low and I feel like I let the kids down when they do not get what they want for Christmas. This year it will be more of the same. Pop took the list, and since Pop gets a Christmas bonus check and I dont, he goes shopping. I tagged along and gave a little direction on some things but try to stay quiet. Its up to him. I can't do what I've always done and I can't get the big things they want so I just keep my mouth closed. Do you know how hard that is? The one day the following week I get it all out and count and see how many they each got. As usual one had more than the other so Pop gets to go back and fix that problem this weekend. I'll give just a little direction and see what happens. Scooter has already notice there is not much under the tree. They each have three small gifts, I have one and Pop has none under the tree. His was his motorcycle riding suit he already has. This makes me super sad but nothing I can do about it. All my income goes to pay the bills and there is nothing left for extras. There would be extra if and when I get the doctor bills paid (6 more months hopefully) and then try getting the tutoring bill paid after that. The bonus check seemed to pay Pops parents back the money he had borrowed from them and also pay for the leather motorcycle riding suit first, then Christmas second or rather third. Hopefully by next Christmas it won't be so hard and I'll be more in the spirit. Until then Bah Humbug!!

A family for Stacey

Girl, Born February 18, 2005

SIGNIFICANT RISK, PLEASE ADOPT ME SOON!!

Stacey is a lovely young lady who is about to turn 5 years old. She has golden blonde hair and big brown eyes. Stacey is DEAF. She is totally normal for her age. Normal development. She is reading by lips, she understands when people are talking looking at their lips. She is a favorite in the orphanage, and the staff and director so hope to find a family for her. She is a beautiful girl with a great personality.

Can you tell I've been looking all morning at the http://www.reecesrainbow.org/angelgirls.html site? These little angels just break my heart. If you can't adopt one now can you give toward helping another family adopt them? Check out the site and see how easy it is.

A family for Olga. Can you be that family?

Here is her information from Reece's Rainbow:

Olga is a beautiful girl with brown hair and deep brown eyes. She is almost 5 years old and has severe CP. She is not able to walk or do much of anything on her own. But she needs a FAMILY!
From one of our own adoptive families who visited with Olga in August 2009: "Little Olga really touched my heart, and I SO hope that she finds a family!!!!! She is such a pretty little girl with a very, very sweet spirit. Her CP is pretty severe, and I don't believe she sees well. Also, her hips look either to be dislocated pretty badly, or else they are just in a bad position. I didn't hold her or try to do anything with her on this first visit but I did talk to her, and stroked her face and arms and whispered sweet nothings in Russian to her. At first she seemed a little wary, but after awhile she softened and I could see what a beautiful little girl there was inside. To the right family who could handle her issues, oh, what a blessing she'd be. I just fell in love with her. I do have more pictures if anyone is interested."
Olga is almost 5 years old and is blessed to still be at the baby house. She is facing institutionalization this Winter, and will likely remain bedridden the rest of her life. :(( Someone please save Olga!
Now... if you are honest you are probably asking yourself the same question that I asked myself. This is all wonderful but, realistically, is anyone going to adopt Olga? In my heart we had to answer YES! We would not be raising money toward her adoption in vain... her family is out there, God is moving in their spirit.

Oh, and by the way, Olga means "Holy".

This post had me in tears. I so wish I could adopt a special child like Olga but I know I can't. How about you? Visit the Reece's Rainbow site and see all the beautiful special children.

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. This year it will be a happy one for me. Since I am adopted and do not know my birthparents, I usually feel all alone on holidays. My adopted parents passed away many years ago and I was the only child they adopted. I know very few facts from being adopted and would love to find my birthparents. Growing up my adopted parents and I went yearly to South Alabama to my aunt and uncles house or to my grandmothers house. There were lots of cousins to play with and I loved it there. I always wanted to move there. I've gotten tired of being alone so with the help of facebook I have reconnected with my cousins and my wonderful aunt. We are heading to South Alabama to see (hopefully) all my cousins, their spouses, children, grandkids and my aunt. I can't wait. We went to visit not to long ago and my youngest son loves it there just as I did when I was young. He has been counting the days until he can go back. I so hope that both of my kids can find a family connection there and have some type of connection to family on my side. The next best thing to this would be for me to find my birth family and eventually have a relationship with them.

Homework Hussle

There are alot of kids out there that do not understand all the stuff that is being taught. I know since I have one of these kids. We try hard most every night to work on what we do not understand but it doesn't always help. Many times I feel like I explain it really different than the teacher does and I give up. I get really frustrated since I do not have a text book in one subject and I do not remember the English grammar to be able to help with that. So I find myself doing the homework hussle almost every night. I've finally thrown up my hands and found a tutor to help with the English grammar. I'm very thankful that the Math teacher is willing to help during some of her planning periods so that we can try and bring that grade up. He just needs some one on one time to figure all this out. From what everyone says he does really well when they take him one on one and work with him. He just has trouble in the class room setting. I know its because the teacher can not wait on just that one person and must move on to something else and I can not do the home school thing since I do not understand it either. Its been so so long since I had to do anything with English grammar. I know I could remember if I had the time but after working all day and then going home to house work I just do not have the time or patience. Good Luck sweet boy. We will make it somehow. I hate that it seems harder for you than for others but your doing great. I'm so proud of you and I love you.

Don't sign up if you don't want to do it.

Some things just bother me. Doesn't matter who does it. It doesn't have to be the kids or the husband just people in general. DO NOT SIGN UP FOR SOMETHING IF YOU REALLY DO NOT WANT TO DO IT. If you sign up then make good and dang sure you show up. Others are counting on you. This applies to charities, service projects, helping friends, studying with others, job applications and may other things. I do not want to hear "I don't feel like it today" because there are many many times that I do not feel like working or cleaning up after you or cooking you something when you should do it yourself. If you join a group and you know it is a service organization then you know you will have to do service projects. If you do not want to do this type of thing then don't sign up. Don't get upset when graduation time comes and you don't get as many scholarships because you do not have as many service hours as the others. Do not tell me it doesn't matter when I see every year that people get scholarships for service hours. Sitting at home watching the boobtube is not going to help you through life. A good job will take you far. Get out there and do something with your spare time. You might find out what your meant to be doing for the rest of your life. At least you will be getting the experience and you can use it on applications for years to come. Just because you do not get paid for your service does not mean it does not count in many ways. If you don't want to do service projects then do not sign up!!!